The Usual Suspect and Mr Right

Friday 11th May
Day passed without any players leaving. Anderson Rocket Tech finally arrived at work, this joy was somewhat tempered by an additional £29 surcharge courtesy of Customs and Excise.

E-mail to team
Ten Things we learnt yesterday!

1) Matt has to leave by 7.30pm, he is however not under the thumb and I am sure the reason is sound.
2) Alex and James have pictures of their cats on their mobile phones, and they are quite proud to show anyone who asks.
3) If you hit an illegal pitch, you run! run! run!!!!
4) Don't hit an illegal pitch, it saves a lot of time.
5) Every time their first base missed the ball, our batters got hit by the ball and stopped us getting extra basis.
6) Debs and Andrew have slightly differing views about where the outfield should stand, but, by golly it was a vast improvement on the previous week.
7) The T-Bolts don't understand the 150 foot rule and nor does that umpire.
8) See, Billy can play after all.
9) Softball is not a summer sport at all, it is in fact best enjoyed by players and spectators when there is a nice cold wind whipping itself across the grounds.
10) I have now got the reputation amongst opposition teams as being a babe magnet, and this is entirely down to attracting women to play softball.
11) Our end of match line ups with the opposition take longer than some of our batting innings.
12) Billy cannot count to ten, except when he is wound up by an extremely irritating ringer and umpire.

Saturday 12th May
Still quiet on the player movement front, and anyway, attention turned to this summers first wedding. A journey into deepest Gloucestershire saw us arrive at Chavenage House (pronounced chave, only recently you’ll understand.) The setting was superb, walking from the courtyard to the reception, I said hello to Gabriel Byrne, he of Usual Suspects fame, Milly said hello too, but totally oblivious to his significance. I wondered whether this was being covered by Hello magazine.

It was a totally relaxed event, which was saved by Milly and Dr Jean who after much persuasion started playing the piano in the absence of the by now un-amplified music. It was only chopsticks but that lead to more adventurous pianists coming out of the woodwork until I swear there was a bloke who reckoned he was Elton John started plonking away. Ended up by driving back Bethan, by the end of the journey, I am sure that her and three female flat mates had signed up to play softball, ‘speak to you in a week’s time!’ Bet she doesn’t.

Monday 15th May
Training seemed to pass off alright, everyone was chatty, laughing and getting on with practising rather than flouncing. Batting practice was order of the day and much to Fiona’s continuing frustrations as the night drew in she constantly swung and missed, diplomatically it was agreed by all that the pitching was rubbish. Had an e-mail from Sarah Gillies, complaining that she had to take charge of the first team and that they were short of blokes. Can we help?

Despite Debs and Alex’s strident advice to the contrary, I said I see who was available. That evening decided that we are going to need a tad more experience in the outfield at least it would save any 150 foot plus conversations. Went fishing on our league website;

Bristol Softball Association Discussion Board: Players Looking for Teams:
Man with good legs looking for regular thursday game
By robwright on Tuesday, May 03, 2005 - 09:57 pm:

Hi folks, I've recently moved to Bristol and am looking to join a team. I learnt the craft in Leytonstoned Again team of London’s Div 1 GLMSL league. I enjoy hitting a home run, catching a home run hopeful and sinking a few cheeky scoops in the bar afterwards. Call me on 0117 xxx xxxx or email if you need a fun loving, dedicated team player.

Rang Rob first and was answered by a broad Yorkshire accent. Unbelievably he lives at the other end of my road. Also had another Gumtree response from a student called Anglea Lim who plays women’s cricket at Bristol University. E-mailed her about practice and said she’d come along.

Tuesday 16th May Friendly vs Real Flyers
Each Tuesday, one Div Three team has to miss out on regular league fixtures, this represents an ideal opportunity to have some practice matches to give everyone experience of game scenarios and help ease the new guys in. Jamie Cole, a very enthusiastic individual, who is quite high in the world of model helicopters, was subjected to some friendly banter from Mark. Only those who had watched Field of Dreams would have got Mark’s ‘Come on Moonlight’ taunts to Jamie. Rob and Angela turned up and looked good fielders, more importantly Rob knows what he is doing out there in the fields. He bought me a cheeky scoop, which translates in southern as being a beer.

Wednesday 17th May‘Are you sure that this is not Thursday?’
It was meant to be a joke, but, the Desparadoes and Grandslammers, all 112 at bats of them, proved that though it was a First Division match by name, it was very much a Second Division match by nature. No-one could catch the bloody thing in the outfield. God it was tedious.

Elsewhere the first team won, Sarah, thanked me for Rob’s presence, no-one else did. Kind of confirmed that my feelings yesterday were spot on, I think Piers, Ginge and Sarah know that I certainly wasn’t doing it for most of the others, well let’s be specific, Mike and the Cockney Prick. Even though saying that Mike and I have been very amicable, we clearly just needed time apart. Amar, not one word, which is so damn unusual for the guy but bliss nonetheless.